Kia Ora my geeky friends,
y’know, my wedding anniversary had me thinking about expressions of love … about how we can show our love in a lot of ways. Nope, wasn’t even being pervy there.
I mean stuff like … I express my love for my kids via kisses, words, loving touch. I also read the same (annoying) books again and again without (much) complaint, make fairly wholesome food on a fairly consistent basis, and put up with the wacky quirks of my wee mob.
In return, they put up with my wacky quirks, they kiss me and cuddle me right back. Fair trade, I say.
And then there is that crazy phenomenon … where we let our worst behaviour show only for those we love and trust the most. Polite in meetings all day, get home and be raggedy as to the family: it is a perverse compliment!
So I’ve been consciously attempting to frame it all as such: when my toddler lays a heavy “NO MUMMY!” my way, I think “how wonderful that she is so trusting as to let it all hang out.” Similarly, Big Girl’s eye rolling. And does it make the night wakings any less exhausting (yes, mama from Nelson, I’m talking to you …) if we think of them as an expression of love, of desire for connection?
It makes me more able to redirect or object with a loving tone and some patience if I think of it this way. You might express your love for me by trusting me with your ill feelings, and I will express my love for you by reminding you of the limits – as calmly as I can.
Whaddya reckon? On to something, or deluded?
(As usual, the answer is likely to be “it depends“.)